Dec. 22nd, 2005

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(Written by my former partner in crime, Kurt G.)

I have long had this feeling that the rest of the world still follows US trends and opinions, only now in a mirror-like fashion. Take, for instance, a story I read this morning on same-sex unions in Great Britain:

LONDON — Rock star Elton John and longtime partner David Furnish led the march up the aisle Wednesday as an estimated 700 same-sex couples in Britain registered their unions on the first day that civil partnerships became, with remarkably little rancor, legal throughout the country.

In fact, the loudest voice of protest came from a gay activist group, OutRage!, over the fact that they weren’t calling these unions marriages. The churches, notably, were either silent, or, realizing their completely emasculated state of being in Europe (OK, I’m sure Vatican City was upset, but, I mean, did you see the picture of the new pope in the Santa hat? Was he preparing to bless the children or eat them?), muted.

I can only imagine some of the conversations people have overseas:

Todd: “Oh my. Look, the US state of Florida not only allows you to conceal and carry a weapon, now they’ve passed some sort of shoot first law that says you can shoot someone on public property if you feel threatened.”

Barbara: “Well, that’s that then. Write the prime minister-we’ll go for a complete ban on handguns, knives, and sharpened sticks. Those dodgy Americans. Be sure to tuck Liza in with our favorite warning-Be good, or the American political system will establish a foothold here!”

Consider the fact that a majority of states have passed anti-gay marriage legislation. For how long have the republicans among us demonized the democrats for ‘social engineering?” Isn’t there some form of insanity in not recognizing the beam in your own damn eye or something like that? Geez! I’ll take the splinter out myself, thanks.

Why do some people have so little to do in their lives that all they can worry about is who is sleeping with who? Not only that, but aren’t there still laws on the books telling heterosexual and homosexual couples what positions they can and cannot use? I’m no prude, but I’m not looking any of you in the eye and telling you whether missionary or bronco riding will get you sent to hell. I’ve got better things to do, and I don’t need that image searing my retinas.

If the US represses scientific theory, the rest of the world embraces it (see Evolution, Darwin’s theory).

If the US suppresses scientific findings, the rest of the world celebrates it (see Global Warming, Family Planning, Stem Cell Research).

If the US embraces personal defense issues, the rest of the world recoils in horror (see Murder Rate Comparisons, US, Everyone else)

If the US feels that war is the only reasonable way of solving a problem, the rest of the world shakes their head and wonders why we enjoy being spoken of in the same breath as Syria, North Korea, and Iran (See Axis of Evil).

It wasn’t always this way. The Bill of Rights may have been the last time we would lead the world, instead, choosing to follow later for the next 250 years (see: emancipation of slaves, entry into WWI, WWII, the treaty to ban landmines, the Kyoto agreement, the United Nations, and others). Sure, we’ve had our moments, most notably in technology and occasionally in attempts to reestablish ourselves as a good and moral nation, but really…

It’s time to look in the mirror.

Happy holidays, everyone.

Kurt

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